Childhood tantrums begin at the age of two but often last until the kid is four years old, despite the term “terrible twos” being used to describe them. Tantrums in older kids are possible, but they ought to be less often and less difficult for them to recover from. Because toddlers start to push boundaries at this age and struggle to express themselves and keep emotional control when they do, tantrums are prevalent at this age. Instead, they could lose control and explode with rage and emotion. These behaviors decrease when kids acquire language abilities and emotional self-control.
Tantrums are common, but as a parent, they can be incredibly upsetting and embarrassing. A youngster throwing a temper tantrum is frequently exhausted, hungry, unhappy, or in public. These situations can make it much harder for a parent to handle a tantrum in a way that promotes growth for their kid rather than restricting or exacerbating the behavior. The terrible twos can be more tolerable, though, if a strategy is in place. Temper tantrums may be prevented, and they can also be controlled after they have begun. We’ll discuss both.
Ways to Avoid Temper Tantrums
Your toddler will inevitably throw several tantrums. There are strategies to lessen the frequency of tantrums kids throw, though.
1. Routine
Toddlers rely on routine to feel in control of their daily activities. Your child will be more comfortable and have less opportunity to have a tantrum if you can maintain regularity. For instance, if your child wants a bedtime story but you don’t give them one, they may throw a fit as a kind of self-control to get things back to normal.
It goes without saying that you will unavoidably break your routine. Try to calm your child when regular changes occur by letting them know in advance. Keep in mind that kids may find them far more upsetting than adults do.
2. Fulfill Needs
If their fundamental needs are not satisfied, kids can quickly lose control, just like adults can. If you’re hungry, weary, or overheated, you’ll lose your temper more quickly. These unmet requirements have an even greater impact on toddlers, who are more prone to act out while they are dealing with them. Having their needs met beforehand is crucial, especially when you’re close to a trigger, such a change in routine or trip to the shop.
3. Allow Choices
Although it may seem strange to us adults, children are learning and showing a need for exerting some control. To make your child feel like they have gained some freedom and can somewhat influence their surroundings, it’s crucial to provide them some outlets for choice. The selection of what clothing to wear, what food to eat, what show to watch, or what game to play are examples of age-appropriate options. Give your youngster two choices to avoid overwhelming them.
4. Praise Calmness
Some kids are aware that having tantrums attracts a lot of attention for them that they would not otherwise receive. Therefore, while your child is not having a tantrum, it is crucial to pay attention to them and compliment them. Praise your child for good conduct when you speak on the phone, eat supper, or at other moments when you would otherwise be busy and less accessible to them. This shows them that they can attract your attention by behaving well.
5. Avoid Triggers
After your child has had a few temper tantrums, you’ll begin to notice what precisely sets them off. Perhaps it’s the grocery store sweets aisle, having to share a particular item, or the nighttime ritual. Whatever it is, you may assist your kid in avoiding these situations up until they develop better means of expressing their wants and feelings. Naturally, temper tantrums will still occur and are significant learning opportunities, but reducing the total number can offer you a respite.
Ways to Handle Temper Tantrums
Your youngster has had a temper tantrum despite your best efforts. This is inevitable, and how you handle the tantrum may significantly influence how much your child develops as a person. Here are some strategies for dealing with your child’s tantrums.
1. Timeouts
When a temper tantrum is coupled with inappropriate behavior, timeouts are an effective solution. Your youngster may have struck someone, destroyed something, or behaved badly because they were feeling overburdened. Then, a little break might help them restore composure and comprehend their actions. When the tantrum is over, these timeouts should be over. Have a brief discussion with your child on how they might effectively communicate their feelings as a follow-up.
2. Distraction
Distraction is a great strategy for temper tantrums that haven’t led to inappropriate behavior. Though eventually your kid will learn to comfort itself, you may help them now by providing diversions. They’ll discover how to shift their focus to more uplifting ideas and discover what sort of activities they might engage in to relax. You can divert their attention by doing the following things:
- A favorite toy
- A pet or a person
- Media, like television or Youtube
- Lunch, snacks, drinks
- A bath, or other part of their routine
It’s crucial to avoid relying on one type of thing too frequently. Giving your child a cookie each time you try to divert their attention, for instance, teaches them how to cope with their emotions. Offering your child their snack to help stop a tantrum isn’t a bad idea, but avoid letting any one thing become a habit.
3. Don’t Reward Whining and Begging
The difference between a tantrum and manipulative conduct might be difficult to make out. Children are discovering at this age that they may appear to feel a certain way and ultimately succeed in getting what they want. Your child’s interest in deceit is totally normal, but you shouldn’t encourage it. If your child cries and begs for the item they are having a meltdown over, refuse to give it to them. You can then give them the item they are throwing a fit over if they can keep their emotions in check and express themselves verbally.
4. Model Good Behavior
Your child’s tantrums could trigger a lot of emotions for you if you experience problems controlling your anger or managing your emotions. You may be able to empathize with their outbursts more than other parents, but you may also find it difficult to provide an example of appropriate behavior for your kid to follow as they learn to manage their own emotions. Reaching out to other people in your life may help you manage your emotions and make sure you’re setting the greatest possible example for others. In fact, simply talking to your child about how you occasionally find it difficult to manage these emotions can help them develop excellent communication skills and realize they aren’t alone.
5. Affirm Feelings
As an adult, it might be hard to recall how different certain circumstances seemed to you as a youngster. Some of the things your child throws tantrums about might seem little to you, such as a lost item, skipping their favorite meal, or skipping reading time. As much as you can, try to keep in mind that your child’s world is considerably smaller than yours and that the things they are upset about are just as important to them as they are to you. Prior to correcting your child’s conduct, it’s critical to understand their sentiments. They develop superior emotional management skills as a result.