You’re familiar with the adage “relationships are a two-way street.” Even though you might be rolling your eyes, there’s a good reason why this tired adage is still in use. Even if we don’t immediately recognize the telltale signals of a one-sided connection, we all have unreliable pals.
Before you find a strong and reliable group of pals, you’ll probably go through a lot of them. Knowing what to do next is essential if a one-sided connection is causing you worry.
We don’t need lousy pals, but we do need friends. Friends are intended to encourage you, be there for you, and make you laugh just because they can. However, both parties must accomplish this. Having a poor buddy makes things more difficult than enjoyable. What purpose does that serve?
Hang on, what is a one-sided friendship?
A definition of a one-sided friendship is necessary before we can discuss the warning signals of one. In essence, a one-sided friendship occurs when one person does all the running and giving while the other person only receives. They sit back and take the rewards while expecting you to do all the effort.
You don’t benefit from the friendship in any manner, thus it’s toxic in many ways. You are not receiving any assistance, inspiration, or amusement.
All of this work is being done for them with no thanks from them. Or, they could occasionally take action merely to keep you around and prevent you from leaving once you discover their sloth.
You might want to take a seat and seriously consider whether or not you have any of these sorts of friendships in your life before we discuss the telltale indicators of a one-sided friendship. The very fact that you are reading this suggests that you most likely do.
The major signs of a one-sided friendship
Sometimes friendships reach the end of their usefulness. It’s natural for a friendship that was never intended to endure a long time to develop in this way.
Some pals, meanwhile, only stay with you because you’re providing them something they want or need. For example, if someone is staying on your sofa for free, don’t you think they’ll remain around? They’re not paying you to house them! Are they truly your friends? How can they help you?
You get what we’re saying? They can sleep on another couch. Watch out for these indications of a one-sided friendship, and if you find any of them in your personal connections, it’s time to break the connection permanently.
1. It’s always you calling them
They never make contact. Though you don’t see them sending you messages to check on you, they react to your SMS. When you call, they pick up. In such case, nothing occurs.
You and you alone are essentially striving to maintain this relationship. Let that baby go under.
2. They only call when they need something
Ah yeah. When they need something, they do like you. Then, out of nowhere, they emerge. Perhaps they are short on rent or need money for a dress. Such a wonderful friend.
They only take, take, take, so you’re definitely running up quite a charge.
3. They don’t listen
They could even be texting on their phones while you’re having coffee, so you may not even have a topic of conversation; you may simply want to share a hilarious anecdote.
They are not actually interested in anything you say in a one-sided friendship unless you remark, “Oh, here’s that money you needed.”
4. They’re never on time
My girl, Aretha Franklin said it best. R-e-s-p-e-c-t. They don’t respect your time if they never arrive on time. They aren’t punctual because they don’t care.
They may have been punctual, but did they really need your assistance or money at those times? BINGO. The puzzle’s components fit together.
5. They control what you do
You two take care of everything they wish to do. There isn’t any giving in. Perhaps whatever you proposed was rejected by them.
One of the telltale indicators of a one-sided friendship is when the other person insists on getting their way no matter what the cost. This is a terrible tyranny, not a friendship.
6. They have half your closet at their place
Borrowing a piece of clothes is OK, but what happens when they have your entire closet on hand? Just purchase your own goods, please. The nicest part is that your belongings are probably scattered on the floor or covered in ketchup. We wouldn’t be skeptical.
7. They’re never there when you need them
Have you recently split up with your boyfriend because you’re a sobbing mess? They probably weren’t there to console you while you sobbed on the couch in a one-sided friendship.
They could have been there when you needed to drink the sorrow away, but it doesn’t make them a true friend. The happy moments were something they wanted to be there for, but what about the bad?
8. They never say “thank you”
Do they ever simply turn to you and thank you after you get them out of a jam? Do they even grasp that phrase? Most likely not. Why is this any different from the other times you’ve helped them?
9. They don’t care
Let’s put it this way: Would they be the first person you’d contact in an emergency? If your response was “no,” you are well on your way to identifying the telltale indications of a one-sided friendship. In fact, it’s reasonable to argue that someone isn’t really your buddy if they aren’t among your top five or 10 friends.
They don’t give a damn. Please understand that they do not want you to perish; most likely, they depend on you to pay their rent. But other from that, they don’t give a damn.
10. They don’t meet you halfway
We really really mean this. If you don’t drive there, you won’t be meeting. It’s possible that they “accidentally” slept in or that they choose not to get ready for you. Just ponder that for a moment.
11. High expectations
This one is on you, then. When people have high expectations of what you provide to the connection since it has always been you, it is one indication of a one-sided friendship. You now have to sustain this standard. They are unhappy if you don’t satisfy it.
12. They put you down
You’ll find out if you enroll in a new art class or do anything else that prevents you from taking care of them. But not in the usual straightforward manner.
They’ll make fun of you and make the case that the time you don’t spend with them is being wasted. Continue taking your pottery lesson and ignore them.
13. They don’t open up
The entire purpose of friendship is to be able to share your feelings and thoughts with someone who can relate to them. However, if you’re the only one giving out personal information and they’re waiting nearby to gather it for their next trick, then you should probably escape.
14.Manipulation is common in a one-sided friendship
Relationships are friendships. They are also vulnerable to mental and emotional abuse. You won’t likely even notice the abuse since you wouldn’t anticipate it coming from a buddy. But trust us, there is actual manipulation.
15. They’re resentful when you take a step back
Instead of feeling sympathetic if you decide to distance yourself from the friendship, they get enraged and bitter. That indicates they are not your friends. A buddy attempts to figure out what went wrong and how to solve it.
How to handle a one-sided friendship
Sit down and give some serious thought to what your friend does, or doesn’t do, and how frequently. We all slack off periodically, so perhaps they’re simply going through a rough patch right now. Give them some time to see if anything changes in that scenario.
However, in the majority of situations, nothing is wrong; this individual is simply a terrible friend.
Sometimes it’s difficult to say goodbye to people, especially to those you believed you could rely on. Though occasionally we give the wrong people our time and attention and open up to those who don’t deserve it.
You were bold enough to be open and vulnerable with someone and attempt to develop a genuine bond, so don’t berate yourself for it. Things’s not your fault that it didn’t work out.
Your one-sided friendship next steps?
You can choose to cut your losses and move on, or you can talk to your friend and express how you feel. It’s unlikely, but not absolutely impossible, that they will fully alter their behavior.
Sit down, speak things out, and try to be as explicit as you can without using language that completely blames them if you want to give it one final shot. Even though you might want to point the finger at them, communication skills are crucial.
Instead of saying “you always,” use “I feel that,” or “I think that.” Give them a chance and maintain an open mind. You’ve chosen to discuss it with them, therefore you must follow through on your choice. Don’t, however, give them an eternity to do nothing about the problems you’ve brought up.
if not, what should I do? Bid them farewell by raising your hand in the air and waving it back and forth. You are capable of more.
During the course of reading this, a few buddies most likely entered your mind. Very nice. You must now choose whether or not to cut ties with them now that you are aware of all the telltale indications of a one-sided friendship.